Now, You!

Now I’m alive to tell the story of how I’ve overcome A victor and not a victim written story The truth about my daily struggles and how it’s met with mercy and grace This isn’t a poem. This is more of a narrative written by a broken person being made whole My freedom doesn’t come from the world and doesn’t come from the words of men I’m not lucky, and my resiliency isn’t a genetic default but a gift of His Spirit A gift of His grace To people who read my blog and my writings, time are tough, and relief seems to be a way away Stay encouraged. Lean on your foundation for dear life. I live paycheck to paycheck I live on food stamps and a monthly gov’t check I never know if my benefits will be cut or continued. But, I lean on supernatural faith. I often have to ask myself whether I buy eggs this week of soymilk I recently lost my job So, understand, you are not alone. This is what I tell myself daily. The creator of the universe understands. Despite the current dilemma, I live with my bills paid, and I have more than enough food. How? I blame Jesus, for he says, “he will never forsake you (me), nor leave you as an orphan” I am writing more of my faith not to push it on people but because it’s my foundation. Who Jesus is to me, Buddha or Allah might be for someone else. I do not have the authority to call any of these deities wrong. They’re essential. I am in a spot to say it’s essential to have a spiritual creator and community to belong to. Even if it’s a community of no faith, a community to belong to is necessary. When we are together, we share the burden of life and strengthen one another. Times are tough, and we shouldn’t go through them alone. I struggle with bipolar disorder and schizophrenia and losing my job triggered an episode. It’s hard. Some days I’m energetic. Some days I want to sleep. Many days I feel there isn’t a point to it all. But I actively push through these negative thoughts because of my faith in Jesus and His Holy Spirit. I believe in Scripture. I know if God can be with me on the mountain tops, he is with me in the valley lows. I’ll fear no evil. I wish we would look at each other past the IG and FB pictures, ask what’s in your fridge and cabinets, and get honest about our struggles in life. That’s what people need, not this superficial stuff. It’s not helping us but tearing our souls apart. I’m being honest. I have not been overcome by the words of my testimony. I believe there will be more job opportunities. I will finish this current class with a minimum of an A-. I will stand firm on the rock of my faith, as will you. Be encouraged. Be honest. Be real. You will make my brothers, my sisters, and nonbinary siblings. I’m praying for you as Jesus prayed for believers. I’m praying that you succeed, your money goes farther, you enjoy your family, enjoy your job, find a new job, children and you succeed in school, you come to a flourishing end, you are equipped, well able, anointed, appointed, God loves you, God has grace, mercy for you. You will become all you set your mind, heart, and attitude to become. I’m praying in Jesus’ name over your life, family, career, and children, and you are happy. Be strong; you will walk and not weary; you will walk and not faint. -Amen .

Kwanzaa: Ujima: Black lives do matter!

• Ujima (Collective Work and Responsibility): To build and maintain our community together and make our brothers’ and sisters’ problems our problems and to solve them together (wiki..)

 

I’d like to highlight the #blacklivesmatter movement for holding the sacred truths of Kwanzaa (deliberate or not). In reality, we are not far from the African American Civil Rights Movement (1954-1968). Our fight as black people may have transition but it has not changed.

2017 saw too much black death, by a fellow brother or sister, by a cop, by leaders who abuse their power, and citizens whom are quick to pick up a pistol before having that same quickness to listen. Sometimes I think we want to see hate, and violence, and discrimination as it’s a mask energy source. As if we as a country do not know how to live in harmony and peace. Or maybe we are afraid of it

Children are not born hateful, it is taught! Allow our children dear universe, equal opportunity to play and scrap their knees with one another. For our daughters not to be discouraged because their isn’t foundation to match their skin tone. For our sons to be known for their character and to not be known for the quality of his sneakers. For our children, dear universe, to aspire to be doctors, lawyers, construction owners, business owners, chefs, inventors, cosmetologist, teachers, and preachers as well. For them, limitless is their only option.  We went to be equally recognized in the media, movies, politics, and music; equally paid not based on gender or skin tone, but on hard work.

Many are threatened by the black lives matter movement/ civil rights movement just like they were in the 50’s and 60’s. There’s not a reason for fear. We black people, minorities, and women are the ones who live in fear. We come in peace. We demand respect, do not apologize for our integrity, we do not apologize for our kinky hair, dark skin, and broad backs. We are made in the image of our father, the creator of the universe. We don’t want our children to fear going to school for the fear of being killed is so surreal. Or fathers in the morning says goodbye to his children, but in his mind, he questions “will this be my final goodbye?”

I don’t want to read about another Trans/Queer/LGBTQIA person being killed, and never given their day of justice in front of blind lady liberty. I don’t want another brother or sister who is Trans/Queer/LGBTQIA and them not be recognized as human beings with a soul and as an equal creation from our creator.

I pray that in 2018 there are no more deaths plagued by the disease or prejudice, racism, and hate. I pray that in 2018 everyone has insurance. I pray that in 2018 no one goes to bed hungry, and no one is sleeping in the winter or summer, under a bridge or on the sidewalks. I pray for change!

I also understand that those who fought and continue to fight the good fight would want us in 2018 to keep fighting, but not just for us. For anyone without a voice. I pray eventually we birth a generation that is moved past race and gender and seen as a human. I pray that our society stops viewing individuals who are not white skin, or blue eyes as different. For we are a people, with a soul, with a story, and a child of the universe; just like them.

It’s our responsibility to our fellow brothers and sisters of the good fight. to build and maintain our community together and make our brothers’ and sisters’ problems our problems and to solve them together

 

“Do you boo!”

What do you do when you don’t feel understood? When you open your voice to speak and nothing comes out. Who do you turn to, when all you get are voice mails? What do you do when you look in the mirror and you can’t recognize your own face? Some people expect you to just get “over” the actions of others, and move on. When it’s not that easy. Sometimes shit hurts and you need to cry, it doesn’t just go away-I mean it didn’t “just happen.” What do you say to yourself, when it seems like you can’t get right, and are the Hebrews running around that mountain, and all you need is a GPS? What do you say to yourself when all you want is a little direction, and instead you get criticism? What happens when it feels like a “prayer” isn’t enough?

What do you do?

If I say scream, there’s a chance you will be seen as odd. If I say cry, there is a chance you will be seen as depressed, and unstable. If I say walk away, then you’ll be observed as cold-hearted. If I say “do you” then you might just be perceived as an individual with an attitude.

What do you do?

Remember that one bible scripture that points out Jesus’s humanity, “Jesus wept.” Remember that within each deity, there was once humanity.

So, what do you do?

Cry! Scream! “Boo, do you!”

Others will always judge you. Not everyone will understand you. Pain is not something you just get over, it’s your journey, and don’t let it hinder you. Don’t let stigma define you, and don’t let trials and tribulations become you. Allow it to become a catalyst and not an end. Use your pain, hurt, fear and everything else as a way to motivate you; to motivate others. Never stop living, achieve your highest goals. If you fall 100 times, at least you got up!

So, what do you do?

LIVE!

 

 

Forgiveness: Why?

Ephesian 4:26

AMPC- when angry, do not sin; do not ever let your mouth (your exasperation your fury or indignation) last until the sun goes down.

My grandma always told me never go to bed angry, and never let anger stop you from getting a good nights rest. I love my grandma, but this can be said about anything. Don’t allow grudges, hate, envy, jealousy consumes your heart and mind; when your energy can be used for greatness. Don’t allow what others say and think about you to enable you from succeeding and enjoying your day. It’s good to feel emotions, it means your human. It’s what you do with your emotions that makes the difference.

So, practice when someone does something mean towards you, in you own time say; “I forgive you”. Forgiveness isn’t for the other person but for yourself. Forgiveness allows you to heal, and to maintain sound-judgment. They say forgive and forget. I say forgive every time you can. Forget when you feel like your ready. Forgetting can prevent from experiencing true forgiveness, the stress that will be released from your body, and the healing of your heart. It’s not always immediately, but it’s better late than never. When you truly forgive, don’t bring it up in every conversation, for, forgiveness is a true release.

I’m not an angry person and will forgive anyone 100 times over, before I hold a grudge and go to bed angry. I guess another piece to that scripture is that, not every day is promised, not everyone wakes up everyday (some die). So, do you really want to go to bed angry, and it could be the last emotion you experience.

I rather build a relationship, have it restored and change what went wrong; remembering the good times then the temporary bad times. Good always win. Just like in the movies. Bottom-line, always forgive, and be slow to anger. Anger and emotions will make you do and say things you’ll never be able to take back. It will destroy a relationship, and you will need to decide does the good out weighs the bad; is it really worth giving up?