Who I am! Where I’ve been!

Readers and Followers,

I’ve been away! Sorry. I needed time to heal and to become stable. I needed to know more about myself. I am now a graduate of Palm Beach Atlantic University. It took 9 years however, I did it.

I needed to create a community for myself. I lost a lot of people on the way. I came out as a Transma FtM (look for more posts on this). I am no longer homeless. I have been declared emotionally stable, with no hospital visits for 2 years and 7 months 11 days.

I’m older! I’m 28. Almost 30! No children or partners yet!

My grandmother has passed. I lost my last great aunt and my forever family. As a result, I was homeless for about 3 years. Life moving from a treatment shelter to supported housing to my own studio apartment has been a journey I’d never want to take again.

I have the best treatment and support team ever. I have the best momma bear Dr. Mouriz. I have a bunny son named Jhonni Root Canal. I am a foster parent to a turtle named Avalos Owen Brown. I have my bio mom back in my life and it’s going great.

I am applying to graduate school. Western New Mexico State University, University of Denver, University of New Hampshire the University of North Dakota. I’d love to earn an MSW and Nonprofit Administration concentration. The next and final degree will be a Ph.D. in Positive or Humanistic Psychology.

I’m out and proud Transman FtM and still Christian! I love my life. I’m loving my transformation mentally and physically. I’m in love with me! I’m in love with life! I’m sad school is over, however, I am learning how to manage time without school for the first time in 9 years. I start my second part of physically transitioning this year (top surgery, look it up).

Life and my goals seem to be coming together. I’ve lost many people and gained so much more. This is really it. My absence has been to focus on treatment, finishing school, organizing my thoughts and battling multiple holiday blues. Now things are settled.

I’m back! Kwanzaa is approaching, my new year! Although I’ve been through a lot in 3 years, It was the greatest journey of my life. The stories I’ve listened to, the prayers with strangers, seeing people at their lowest and become better individuals and the spiritual and religious growth outstanding.

I’m an official Sailfish! Always will be! Graduation was in May! We had a virtual one thanks to Covid-19 I’m still pumped!

I missed you all and missed reading your blogs!

I’m Back!

I’m officially changing my name to:

Domenia Xih Zih

Good Bye Foster Care

In a month in a half I will be aging out of the state foster care system, moving to a new state and attending a new university. I am not sure how I should feel. For the journey in foster care wasn’t an easy one but the state of CT foster care system became my parents. They raised me!

I guess in a way I feel institutionalized, I’ve always had health insurance, a place to stay (foster homes, shelters and group homes), and social workers. I will now have to pay co-pays for my medication, continue my education, afford my education; find housing on my own, and manage a job, school, church and mental health.

Life in 23 years has taught me to have a voice, advocate for myself, knowing that it’s okay to cry, my history has made me victorious and not a victim. I have not always had a stable family for support, I mean, my family did what they could; my biological mother tried and I have every right to hate her and my family for allowing me to get hurt and leaving me in a state system, but, it’s not how I am going to start my journey as a young adult and it wasn’t meant to be any other way.

I can’t believe it, I’ve survived and have successfully aged out of the the CT’s foster care system! No more court dates, family visits, worrying about living in group homes and foster families. It feels great. I feel freedom. I feel joy. I feel fear.

I am moving to another state (Florida) and attending Palm Beach Atlantic University. I have a new found responsibility of taking control of my life. I feel a release and a breakthrough from my past, my family, organize religion and labels. I’m starting over and free to live a life worth living for. I know my fears will subside and I will find my balance. I’ve been given the experience and support to make it.

I’m just excited to leave, and I hope when I am traveling to college that I see a sign that says:

Welcome Domenia L. Dickey to West Palm Beach, Florida and Palm Beach Atlantic University.